I Can Do This......

Although much of my life is a bit unknown these days, one element is painfully familiar. I have once again embarked on a healthier lifestyle complete with working out and (fingers crossed) weight loss. I have chosen to mention the journey as a way to be accountable, even though I run the inherent risk of being invited to even more Body by Vi parties.

Becoming fit and healthy has been an ongoing challenge throughout my life. As much as I tend to think of myself as a colossal failure in this area, my pleasing husband is quick to point out that I have actually had multiple successes peppered with periods of backslide. He's cute - but come on! This is also a man that stands 6' 4" and requires about 47,000 calories a day to keep from feeling light headed.

During bleak moments I can really get myself into a state thinking about all of the broken promises and wasted years my issues with food have allowed. However, I am learning to be a little bit kinder to myself. The fitness/weight loss industry wouldn't generate a hundred bazillion dollars a year if it were simple. Also food is awesome, it's readily available, and creamy and gooey beats crunchy and healthy most of the time. I never carried out imaginary vengeance on a mean boy over steamed broccoli. That is strictly a job for Haagen Dazs.

So no matter what brought me here, I am at proverbial square one trying to get my increasingly creaky body to crave a better way. I have enlisted the personal training expertise of Sara (the spitfire). You can tell she's a trainer by her unbridled energy and enthusiasm. Sara celebrates my half assed push-ups the way new parents celebrate a gas bubble. It's a little off the charts, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't appreciate it.

As far as the food goes, don't all of us pretty much get the basics? If you really crave it - you probably shouldn’t have it. I am always amused when Sara tells me that I can have whatever I want; “just plan for it and watch your portions”. Ha ha ha ha ha ha - good one! I do get the concept though - and who knows - maybe this time's the charm.

So after a few weeks of tweaking the diet and hitting the gym, the scale still doesn't seem to care. Yeah, yeah, I feel better and my heart is stronger - big whoop. I want baggy pants! On a more positive note my husband switched from double cheeseburgers to single cheeseburgers and is down 7 pounds.

As if marriage wasn't hard enough already??

Stay well.....

That was fast......

Well – it’s been 6 months since I last uttered a word on the radio. The time has passed in an absolute flash. I know that at least 8 out of every 24 hours had been spent sleeping (yaaaa!!) – the remaining 16 hours are more of a question mark.

I had hoped by now I would have completed a thorough and exhaustive career search discovering some deep professional desires long lurking within me. That has not happened. I had hoped by now my inner Hemmingway would have leapt forth and spilled out over pages and pages of riveting text. That has not happened. I had hoped by now I would be a size six. Well…you can probably guess how that’s gone…...not happened!

Here’s what has happened; I have begun to understand that 3 years of discourse and stress takes a toll on you, and left unchecked begins to change who you are. I have recognized that no matter how much you do right, lousy people can end up holding some cards in your life, and you are subject to their own shortcomings.  I have also discovered that starting over is a small price to pay for choosing peace over chaos.

The other day I was at the dry cleaner and I ran into a friend of mine from the media world. She had this beautiful, warm smile and quickly congratulated me on my “new job”. I chuckled and asked where I was working? The truth is that I have not made one step towards finding employment just yet – but it’s nice to be talked about. After six months of doing laundry and trying out recipes even the notion that I could be relevant is exciting. I certainly haven’t ruled out a return to the media – but I haven’t ruled out anything else either.  I do know that I hope to be working somewhere, doing something, sometime this fall. That’s about as far as I’ve gotten.

It seems I seldom leave the house without bumping into a former listener with a kind word, and a desire to know where I’ve gone. I suppose to the naked eye I would appear to have gone nowhere. I can assure you though; the last six months have brought me miles from where I was.

Enjoy the sunshine, and thanks for reading!